Wisdom: December 2023

My favorite way to conceptualize the process of dysregulation is using the visual of steam rolling out of one's ears and head, eyes red with anger, and pursed lips; a person that has effectively "flipped their lid" and is no longer using their cognitive mind or their heart to make decisions. When we are dysregulated, we cannot respond in the way that is most in line with our values. We may act unethically or in a manner that creates barriers. Rather than building bridges, we burn them down.

In this sense, when regulated, we act in ways that benefit us, align with our values, and are ethically sound. Ethical action leads to wise choices. Wise choices, over and over, lead to wisdom. And wisdom is cumulative and doesn't come and go. Wisdom uses both the head and heart to guide us forward. Each time we choose to regulate our minds and bodies amid upset, the neuropathways of groundedness, compassion, and wise action deepen. The next time you notice steam escaping your head, take it as an opportunity to wake up, to ground down, and to take wise action toward your values.

An extension of ethical action is the practice of building bridges, as discussed by Tara Brach recently. In this reflection, Tara examines how bridging inner and relational divides can lead to an evolution of consciousness in our species and awakening to greater connectedness and love. You can listen to her talk here.
 
Lastly, move this into everyday practice by spending a few moments in the evening to review the day, assessing the moments that you acted in wise ways and those moments that you may not have. By becoming aware, we begin to see behavior patterns and can better pause and make wise decisions.

Cheers to building bridges,
Caitlin